Well, I'd Say SOMETHING Is Hollow Here

There are some people who would think it's in my wife's best interest NOT to be sent to the North Pole because she might fall in a giant hole that leads to the center of the earth. I hope you are not among them.

If you're a Hollow Earther, then you either haven't read or you reject as hogwash what Wikipedia calls "overwhelming observational evidence [such as, like, gravity], as well as [...] the modern understanding of planet formation" and the fact that "the scientific community has dismissed the notion since at least the late 18th century."

Or, you're just nuts.

In a world where you can be an ordinary citizen of Kansas who declares the elections of the previous five popes invalid in order to justify calling yourself Pope Michael, surely we'd be able to find someone who still believes in the hollow earth theory:

Yes. The earth is hollow. Of course it is. Skeptical? Well, check out this image from the site:

It all makes sense now. I shouldn't be so sarcastic. Perhaps all those things the website says about our hollow planet is true:

It is a terrestrial paradise,

...where the original Garden of Eden is located today

...where the Lost Tribes of Israel live
...where the Political Kingdom of God is located

...where the Lost Viking Colonies of Greenland migrated to
...where vanquished Germans migrated to after World War II

...where flying saucers come from

...where people live to be hundreds of years old in perfect health

...where peace and prosperity exists for everyone

...where Heaven is located (the inner sun)

But if it were true, Heaven aside, it sounds like a pretty crowded place to be, what with the Israelites and Vikings and Nazis and aliens and such. If you send Jenn to the North Pole — and you do that by voting for her — I'll have to make sure she avoids stepping into any large holes. There could be polar bears...or plenty of very old men who haven't seen a woman under the age of 150 in a very long time.

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If this convinces you that you should send my wife to the North Pole, please click this text which is in fact a link that will take you to her essay so you can vote for her so she'll have a chance to go to the North Pole. Thank you.